When I was in my teens I began searching for the "something more" that seemed to be missing at the Methodist church I had attended since I was a babe in arms. Not knowing how to find what was missing, I began to visit the Southern Baptist church (the only other church in our little community at that time). Friends there had been urging me to visit, and I hoped that there might be help there. One thing I learned was that those among the Southern Baptists that I had contact with (as well as the Methodists I grew up with) didn't like questions. They had a lot of answers, but they were not the answers to the questions that were troubling me.

For example, James 4:8 tells us to "Draw nigh to God, and He will draw nigh to you". This was an area where I needed some guidance. How exactly do you draw nigh to God?, I wondered. Hebrews 7:19 says, "For the law made nothing perfect, but the bringing in of a better hope did; by the which we draw nigh unto God.", but I wasn't sure how to apply this verse--it was an explanation of the basis on which we could "draw nigh", but what were the practical elements of "how" we draw nigh? The Methodists had just sort of smiled vaguely, and said to just "love jesus and be good", figuratively patting me on the head and sending me on my way. There certainly was nothing wrong in telling me to love Jesus, and I did try to be "good" -- it was not bad instruction, as far as it went (although stated that way it raised more questions in my mind than it answered)--and I did learn later that obedience to God's commandments was a "drawing nigh", but not enough information was given at that time (to a shy--but stubborn--and confused young girl) for this to be interpreted by me in a helpful way.

The answer for me from the Southern Baptist folks was a little more helpful--they said that in order to "draw nigh to God" I should have a daily regularly scheduled "Quiet Time" during which I was to read my Bible, perhaps memorize some Scripture, meditate, and pray. All of these things, of course, were good to do ... the problem *I* had with this was in the suggested formulaic approach of setting aside a specific time each day, preferably in the early morning hours (several Scriptures were used to support this "time of day"), and "meet God there" at that time--sort of a "divine appointment" with God. This sounded good on the surface, but how could *I* make "divine" appointments? How I could command God's attention in so simplistic a way was the question in my mind--it seemed to me as if in doing this, in this suggested way, that I was "summoning" God to meet me then ... as though *I* was in charge. But if *I* was in charge, how could God be God? Nevertheless, I knew that as a young pilgrim there was a lot I didn't know and I assumed that those older than me knew a lot more than I did, so I made a weak attempt at doing this. I did feel God's presence occasionally, but not every time...not even most of the time. In addition to the times that I felt God near, I did gain other things from this practice--I memorized some Scripture and became more familiar with the Word. But I wasn't sure it was what James meant by "drawing nigh to God", although I couldn't really articulate what it did mean. Something still seemed to be missing.

The Psalms became a key for me in this. Some of the Psalms are heart cries to God by one in need; some are acknowledgements of a creature before his creator; some are paeans of praise and thanksgiving to the loving and powerful God....they are, among other things, about relationship. The Psalms helped me to "draw nigh to God", as I made the words of the Psalms *my* words in expressing my needs and looking to God's sufficiency in Christ for help. As I continued on the pilgrim path, I learned more about this "drawing nigh" as I learned more about the God I was seeking to approach. I learned that although He is to be "feared" (He is the omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient God, and therefore I couldn't just "amble" into His presence--I must bow in acknowledgement of who He is), this powerful, all-knowing, ever-present God is also a loving, caring, forgiving God. Praying to God is a relationship gift that He has given to His beloved people.

As I grew in my knowledge of Him, my desire to serve Him grew, and I began to understand more about my "drawing nigh" from His side of things. Psalm 34:18 told me that "The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit." A "broken and a contrite heart" (Ps. 51:17) was not an inappropriate state in which to turn to Him in prayer at any time. Isaiah 57:15 told me this: "For thus saith the high and lofty One that inhabiteth eternity, whose name is Holy; I dwell in the high and holy place, with him also that is of a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of the contrite ones." In drawing nigh, I must come to Him "Just as I am, without one plea but that Thy blood was shed for me" -- a sinner saved by grace. Isaiah 66:2 told me that God had said that "to this man will I look, even to him that is poor and of a contrite spirit, and trembleth at My word." I am to draw nigh to Him humbly (and when I later learned the teaching about the depravity of my unredeemed heart, I learned just how humble I truly was). Humility is necessary, but Hebrews 4:15-16 taught me that , yet "we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need." This gave me the assurance that He would hear and help, and that He would accept my sacrifice of praise, but I must draw near to Him in relationship -- that is, I must come to Him in the reality of my sinfulness, and in the knowledge that "...all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of Him with whom we have to do" (Heb 4:13 ). But I could come without hesitation or stumbling--boldly, in other words--in the reality, and on the basis, of God's reconciling love in Christ. "For God so loved . . . "

Prayer then, I learned, is a gift that is rooted in the reality of God's relationship with His people, corporately and individually. "Drawing nigh"--coming near to our Beloved--is in relationship that is real (authentic) in fundamental--and ultimate--reality. This is a relationship that is true, undergirded by the Truth of who God is. Therefore I can come before the God of the Universe knowing that He is sovereign, that He cares for me, that He will hear my petitions and praise, and bless me according to His will, His wisdom, and His love for me.

As to some other specifics of the "discipline" of praying, written prayers of the saints through the ages have been very helpful to me--especially at those times when words come slowly and incohesively to me. One of the most helpful comments I've received about praying came from a friend in Canada who told me about three 3-word prayers (these less wordy prayers have been termed by some as "arrow prayers" or "telegram prayers"--quick, trusting glances toward God for help, or in acknowledgement of His blessings). These can be prayed in times when thoughts are jumbled, in emergencies, as cries from the heart, as an expression of thanksgiving, as an acknowledgement "in the midst" of things, etc. These simple prayers help us fulfill the injunction to "pray always". (One of these three 3-word prayers is NOT, "O my god", which I have grown quite weary of hearing from any and everybody in all kinds of situations, as a nonsensical comment of surprise, and having nothing to do with the God of the universe... to me, it smacks of taking the Lord's name in vain; however I *can* imagine saying it as a true heart cry in times of confused desperation, so I acknowledge humbly--and thankfully--that I am not the final judge here.) The three 3-word prayers are:

Lord, have mercy.
Into Thy hands.
Thee I adore.

When these three prayers were brought to my attention I was already praying "Lord, have mercy" several times a day (having been pointed to this simple prayer by another friend), only I prayed it as "Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, a sinner". (This prayer is based on Luke 18:38: "And he cried, saying, Jesus, thou son of David, have mercy on me"). Now I pray also the "Into Thy hands" prayer often, and it helps me to relinquish the things that disturb my peace with God, and the things I really can't do anything about anyway, placing them before Him in trusting faith and leaving them there. The "Thee I adore" prayer helps since I am far too slow to acknowledge God's intervention for good in my life in the "small", daily things. ("Thank you, Jesus" could also be added.) It pains me greatly to realize that when the Lord blesses me throughout a "normal" day that, like the nine lepers (Luke 17:17) I turn my back to God and walk away without acknowledging His blessings. When things are going well I assume that things are going along as they should, and perhaps they are ... but not because I "deserve" it, or because this is the "expected" course of things, but rather because God is there blessing and helping me in countless ways--ways that I can't even imagine at the time. Sometimes, when I look back at the events of a trying time, I become aware that something--some circumstance or happening--about which I wasn't very happy at the time actually *saved* me in that situation. And I never cease to be amazed at how often God intercedes in the lives of those for whom we pray. In an increasingly cynical world, I'm humbly thankful for this gift of "seeing"--a sense of wonder and awe that leads to worship of our glorious God, and I'm thankful to be able to see--by faith--"behind the scenes" at what is happening in the lives of those around us, as well as in my own life, as God deigns to be involved in our history. "Watch and Pray", Christ said to His disciples (Mark 13:33). We also need to "pray, and watch", to pay attention when the prayers become reality. Grace all around. As Evelyn Underhill said, "grace is pouring down on us all the time, whether we know it or not, whether we acknowledge that grace or not." As disciples of Christ, we should be faithful to acknowledge it.

"Thee I adore", most gracious Father. Thou art my Guide and Help, Blessed Holy Spirit. Thank you, Jesus.

Another prayer that has helped me in a specific way is one found in Psalm 109:21 "But do thou for me, O GOD the Lord, for Thy name's sake: because Thy mercy is good, deliver Thou me." (A dear older sister in a nearby Primitive Baptist church introduced this one to me.) Sometimes this verse is shortened to "Do Thou", with a pleading, trusting look upward. And sometimes it's adapted to "Do Thou" for ________ (injecting the name of whoever is in need of God's grace). Amy Carmichael has written a beautiful prayer-poem based on Psalm 109:21:.

Do Thou for me, O God the Lord;
Do Thou for me.
I need not toil to find the word
That carefully
Unfolds my prayer and offers it,
My God, to Thee

It is enough that Thou wilt do,
And wilt not tire;
Wilt lead by cloud, all the night through
By light of fire,
Till Thou hast perfected in me
Thy heart's desire.

For my beloved I will not fear;
Love knows to do
For him, for her, from year to year,
As hitherto.
Whom my heart cherishes are dear
To Thy heart too.

O bless-ed be the love that bears
The burden now,
The love that frames our very prayers,
Well knowing how
To coin our gold! O God the Lord,
Do Thou, do thou.

Elisabeth Elliot wrote, concerning prayer: "I would be hard put to improve on Paul's prayer for the Roman Christians when I am praying for my friends (as an old lady in Canada used to pray for me, and included this prayer in nearly every letter she wrote me): "Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost." (Romans 15:13 ) And who knows--save God--what the outworking of this prayer for Elisabeth, by this unnamed woman in Canada so many years ago, had in the life of Elisabeth Elliot as she traveled the pilgrim path. Elisabeth Elliot's life of faithful discipleship has been a beacon for me through much of my pilgrim journey.

A prayer that I have used to pray for others is found in Philippians 1:9-11--and I pray it now for all of you (and for myself): "And this I pray, that your love may abound yet more and more in knowledge and in all judgment; That ye may approve things that are excellent; that ye may be sincere and without offence till the day of Christ; Being filled with the fruits of righteousness, which are by Jesus Christ, unto the glory and praise of God."

As you draw nigh to our Saviour and God, I offer this benediction prayer (which I love to hear prayed for me) for all of you. . .

"The LORD bless thee, and keep thee:
The LORD make his face shine upon thee, and be gracious unto thee:
The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace." (Numbers 6:24-26)

In Him to Whom we pray,
Elaine